-scotty

“IN 2000 four Americans were charged with importing lobster tails in plastic bags rather than cardboard boxes…three of them got eight years apiece. Two are still in jail.”

– (The Economist: Crime and punishment in America)

Should’ve sent those guys on a backpacking trip in Europe! Only $25,000.

@cafe gratitude

July 22, 2010

waitress: (brings out a milkshake) are you beautiful?

me: no.

i haven’t ordered yet.

Bfffffffff Timothy Lee: I think I’m discovering the gift of celibacy

– Elizabeth Gilbert

July 20, 2010

July 17, 2010

I wiki-ed “bumble bee.” “Bumble bee shouldn’t be able to fly” is a myth. They work like helicopters do.

I liked life better before I wiki-ed.

(john mayer playing, on the drive up to berkeley)

mom: what is this crap? is this music? what’s wrong with his voice?

(to me) “i’m just trying to imagine what you would look like bald.”

——

me: do you want your wife to work or stay at home?

tim: i don’t really care. whatever she can do to keep herself busy so she won’t cheat on me.